Giving Yourself Grace

Grace. It’s something we talk about all the time as Christians, but when it comes to giving it to ourselves, it often feels like the hardest thing to do. I struggle with this constantly, especially when I fall short of being the Christian woman, mother, or wife I want to be. A couple of months ago, I shared about the pressure to be perfect and the importance of embracing God’s grace. But what about extending that same grace to ourselves? 

We know God’s grace covers us, yet we can be our own worst critics. I’ve found myself doing this more than I’d like to admit—feeling guilty when I don’t measure up to the standards I’ve set for myself. But if God, in His love, is gracious toward us, shouldn’t we learn to give ourselves the same grace? 

There are days when I lose my patience, forget to pray, or let the stresses of life get the better of me. And instead of giving myself grace, I beat myself up. "Why didn’t I handle that better?" "I should have done more.” “Why can’t I get it right?” These are the questions that run through my mind on those hard days. But the truth is, I'm just human, and sometimes I forget that.

I forget that God isn’t sitting there, disappointed, shaking His head at me. He’s offering grace—freely, abundantly—because He knows I’m not perfect. He knows I’m going to stumble and struggle. Yet, He loves me deeply, just as I am, flaws and all. 

So why is it so difficult to give myself the same grace? If God can look at my imperfections with love and compassion, why can’t I do that for myself? 

The truth is, I think many of us have a hard time with this. We strive for perfection, especially as women—whether it’s in our Christian walk, motherhood, marriage, or work. We hold ourselves to such high standards that when we inevitably fall short, we’re quick to criticize and slow to forgive ourselves.

But what I’m learning, slowly but surely, is that God doesn’t expect me to be perfect. He’s not asking me to have it all together all the time. What He wants is my heart. He wants me to trust Him, to lean on Him when I feel like I’ve failed, and to accept the grace He so lovingly offers. 

We talk about giving others grace, but how often do we forget to give ourselves that same kindness? The same way I would never condemn a friend for falling short, I need to learn to extend that compassion to myself. Because the reality is, I’m doing my best, and some days, that’s more than enough. 

If you're like me, constantly battling the feeling that you’re not doing enough, let me remind you (and myself) that God’s grace is sufficient. It's okay to fall short. It's okay to not be perfect. We are human, and His grace is more than enough to cover our imperfections.

Let’s practice giving ourselves grace, because God already does. 

Lord, I come to You today feeling weighed down by my own expectations. I often forget that You see me through the eyes of grace and love, even when I’m hard on myself. Help me to let go of perfection and to embrace the grace You give me freely. Teach me to give myself the same kindness, especially on the days when I feel like I’m not enough. Remind me that in You, I am enough—just as I am. In Jesus’ name, Amen.